If you build it, I will come. That’ll be my approach to the Nintendo Switch 2 Edition of The Legend of Zelda: Tears of the Kingdom when it launches alongside the upcoming system this June. You see, I’m a rabid, diehard fan of both Breath of the Wild and Tears of the Kingdom, with hundreds of hours in each. I have very likely surpassed a thousand between the pair. But I cannot construct a single thing to save my life.
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This has been a lifelong problem. When other children played with Lego, I was reading books. When they were building sand castles, I was watching documentaries on the Middle Ages. When my school art class was instructed to form those little clay jars, I ‘accidentally created an abstract’, which was my excuse for the ball of clay remaining just that. My point is, if there is a creative constructive exercise to be found in life, I will be nowhere near it.
Thus, for all my unabashed love for Tears of the Kingdom, all the marketing talk of Zonai devices and vehicle crafting went in one ear and out the other. Every time they marketed the game’s DIY system, my eyes drifted past it all. Oops, I stared at the scenic vistas behind the tanks and jet planes. Woe is me; I missed it all. I wasn’t going to be capable of making this stuff, so it wouldn’t be ‘canonical’ to my own in-game world.
Still, it was super cool that some people were hyped to get stuck in with these creative mechanics. And, sure enough, the post-launch period showcased a plethora of particularly phenomenal devices. Cars? Check. Boats? Check. A wagon for your beloved steeds? Check. Do you want to ride on Godzilla? I want to ride on Godzilla. Are there people who somehow do not want to ride on Godzilla? I’ve not met them. Did I have it in me to watch detailed videos on Godzilla’s construction? Haha, no. No Godzilla for me.
Suddenly, Godzilla is almost within my grasp. On Switch 2, and via a smartphone app, players will be able to download constructs from across the community. It’s fair to say that many of the most prolific sharers will number among the most talented, too. Craft me your gorgeous boats; I will board them. Make me a Pikachu, too – that would be funny, right? Give me a guillotine if you can. Morbid, I know, but just imagine the Bokoblin-snaring possibilities.
Do all of these things and more. Save me from my own failings. Show me your most vivid ambitions, and I swear to you, I shall unleash them upon the forces of evil. Ganondorf has no idea what he’s in for, and I take zero credit for that. There will be millions of heroes of Hyrule in my next Tears of the Kingdom adventure, and not one among them will be me. I will carry the snazziest and most ludicrous weapons to my foes, and they will feel everybody else’s fury. I am the peasant, and you are the seven samurai. I cannot wait.
